day 4

Today's technically the 4th (business) day of my unemployment. I haven't exactly been cracking with the job search, though. I applied for a few CSR positions but each time I think of going back to customer service I want to vomit. I haven't been writing either. Some changes of note:

Had an up and down weekend; mostly up. We both started our period so emotions have been running higher than usual. After much soul searching, we decided to move in together into a one bedroom as a "couple". I put that in quotes because we also decided not to label whatever it is we are/whatever stage we're at. Like she said, we don't necessarily have to be in a relationship to keep loving each other. The breakup (less than 3 weeks ago) and the subsequent drama has brought us closer. It's also brought me closer to confronting my inner shit. I've learned so much. I have my next session with Jessica the therapist on Thursday at 3. Feeling kind of guilty for not keeping up writing but fuck it; this is my recovery and I'll go at the pace I'm comfortable with. I've yet to tell my mother. I won't be able to talk to her until after the World Cup. That sounds funny but it's true. Weekdays she's at work; at night she's with him. On the weekends, she's with him or watching the games. What I have to tell her isn't something I'd want to bring up in a restaurant or coffee shop.

I'm meeting up with an old coworker today. I'm sure it's to tell me she's losing her job. Sorry but I have no prospects for you. On the contrary, I need one myself. I wish I had the luxury to not work but honestly being unemployed is boring. There's only so much TV and internet you can take before you want to shoot your eyes out. I have few friends so it's not as if I can call someone up and hang. Besides, the few friends I have are at their jobs.